What's a gal to do when her man's giving her everything she wants except a ring? This irreverent guide will help the marriage-ready woman evaluate the severity of her not-so-ready man's excuses for delaying marriage and sharpen her abilities to dismantle them. With a funny but firm hand, Lori Uscher-Pines, who herself maneuvered for a ring from her now-husband, offers the reader serious tips for securing a marriage proposal from the excuse-ridden, free-milk-gulping man she loves.
Buying the Cow in the Age of Free Milk includes: How to know if it's really time to push for a ring. The difference between me excuses, you excuses and institution of marriage excuses. The "severity" scale of common male excuses, and the associated tactics for changing his mind. Behavior fouls not to make on the quest for a proposal. Pushing for a proposal is about female empowerment, and this must-have guide will help the reader take control of her personal life without giving up the romantic, "then-he-got-down-on-one-knee" moment she's always imagined.
Part 1 Bringing the Cow to market: Preparing Yourself for the Get-Your-Man-to-Marry-You Plan
1. How This Cow Sold Herself
2. The Truth About Marriage (You Can Handle It)
3. Are You Sure You Want Him to Buy Now?
4. Are Yu Sure You Want This Bull?
5. The Pre-tactical Talk: Diagnosing His Excuse
6. Tactics 101: Sharpening Your Tools
Part 2 The Get-Your-Man-to-Marry-You Plan in Action: Your Man’s Excuses and Your Tactics
7. He’s Checking Out of Single-Mart: Low-Intensity, Low-Risk Tactics
8. He Knows Your Ring Size: Minor-Intensity, Minor-Risk Tactics
9. He’s Calculating Two Months’ Salary: Modest-Intensity, Modest-Risk Tactics
10. He Needs a Good Poke from the Cattle Prod: High-Intensity, High-Risk Tactics
11. He’s Lactose Intolerant: The Ultimatum
Part 3 Mistakes on the Way to Market: A Careful Cow’s Primer of Nuptial-Pushing No-Nos
12. It’s What You Say and How You Say It: Common Traps to Avoid
Part 4 Solo or Married…and Fabulous
13. Post-Plan Cows Look Back